Wasn’t it yesterday when we lay in bed
with me holding you tight?
The life we lived was okay. We didn’t fight and
you swore we’d stick together for the rest of our lives.
You said it was the only way, but I didn’t know only a few
hours remained before you’d tiptoe out the door and go away
without a word. Are you thinking of me?
If you were okay I’d be rich today. You spent every cent I earned
working night and day. When I asked you for some cash, you said,
“Get out and don’t come back until you’ve got a pocketful of dough.”
Memories of love are deranged after the way you arranged for me
to live like a snake after you slithered into my brain, and dashed away
any hopes or beliefs residing in there.
I didn’t care how you mistreated me., because I couldn’t see you didn’t love
me then, but when evil thoughts infiltrated, I’m sad to say, I tried
to make them go away, but they stay with me every day.
I try to perceive splendor spreading through the world, but my eyes
only see that I’m not happy with the life I have. I can no longer play, and
I’m beginning to believe that when the end of my life arrives, it’ll be a relief,
now that I understand, what was there wasn’t splendid at all, even
when we embraced. Wicked, wicked folks surround me, and they don’t know
how to love. Though they always treat me better than you ever did,
I’ve always desired you, but I’ve got to say, longing has put my mind
in an evil vein, and I suffer pain, so I try not to remember when you said,
“Get out of bed and don’t come back until you’ve got a pocketful of dough.”
Do you know if you were here, I’d hold you tight until your heart-beat
like a hammer and your eyes filled with tears. It would seem like a million
years before I let you go. I want to show you I can forget those words
that came from your mouth about being naughty and nice, because in my heart,
I knew how bad you were, and never any good. Now for every word you
spoke, you have to pay the price when I’m as naughty as you like.”
If you would have treated me well, in any weather, we’d always be together.
Part of the price you have to pay is to endure the pain when you watch me,
like you, tiptoe out the door and vanish too.