A Writer’s Question

A Writer

What’ll I write today? Will it be okay if my words that are buried deep
within my brain are too plain or become maimed? Will they eclipse,
turn blue, or change in another way as they pass through my lips and
struggle to not break like glass?

My neurotransmitters refuse to submit those hung up struggling words
because there’s a gap between neurons and synapses that need more
chemicals to make their trip electrifying so they are wired to find the
way to my lips and yet, forget to ellipse.

I smoke some dope and hope to awake parts of my brain that has words
to release, but have ceased because my synaptic gap grows until chemicals
produce and introduce every letter of every word sent to my mind to mix
messages so every word I want to say doesn’t stay but goes away.

I’m confused, and feel abused, so what’ll I do? Smack my stupid head to mend
or maybe wed together the spaces put in places by chemicals swimming inside,
but the hit to the head causes confusion and puts every word
I want to say into seclusion before they die.

My words stay inside, try to hide from the rising tide, but get washed away
by the energy wave bursting inside my brain from the drug I swallowed and
what followed I can’t express what’ went wrong or what’s going on. My neurons
are energy deprived and can’t live on the food I eat so they struggle to survive in
a stormy sea when I try to create a word.

To placate those minuscule things that refuse to ride and choose to float Inside
I comply with my neuronal demands and infuse strong drugs I should have
used all along, so the words that come to mind wouldn’t get buried or blurred
and replaced by others that are not as decent or good,