Monthly archives: April, 2015

Free audio version of A Penis Manologue i if you qualify

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The Prisoner

Captured by Confederates Gilbert Gaul   The Prisoner On the second of March, 1864, General Kilpatrick hand-picked me as one of the four thousand men bound for a raid on Richmond, the capital of the Confederate States of America. I’m sure one reason the general picked me is my size. At six feet three inches…




Cryonic Man

 



#129 Save The Bear.

My nose is running like a raging river, my eyes burn like they’re on fire, my body aches and I can hardly walk. All because I was stupid enough to come to Chicago where it’s so cold, the zoo had to take its Polar Bear inside so it wouldn’t freeze. Like a fool, I thought…




#128 Lost My Muse

#128 Lost My Muse   Van Gogh cut off his ear to give to his muse. What was I to do? I had lost mine and as an artist my career was over unless I could get her to return. Last summer I rented a cottage on a lake surrounded by trees much older than…




Louise, Louise

#127 Louise, Louise.   Louise wasn’t much to look at when I first met her. But she grew to be beautiful, and her reddish blond hair was so soft to the touch I could hardly keep my hands off. We grew close. Very close, until one day we were at the beach, and she played…




War. What is it good for?

Q: War. What is it good for? Ethics War & Conflict History War as Creative Destruction Editors’ pick Peter Turchinscientist and author, Connecticut Science 34870  10 · 8 From the heart of all matter Comes the anguished cry – ‘Wake, wake, great Shiva, Our body grows weary Of its law-fixed path, Give us new form….



#126 Species War

#126 Species War I felt it crawling over my face. Its antennae tickled my right eye. Opening my left eye, I saw a giant roach with a sack of eggs as big as she sitting on the bridge of my nose. I didn’t move because I didn’t want to frighten her and cause her to…




#125 A Doggy Kiss Creates Oxytocin

#125 A Doggy Kiss creates Oxytocin I went into a local store to buy supplies for a hike in the woods. When I told the shopkeeper where I was going, he warned, “There are man-eating animals in those woods, and they’re not the kind you’d expect.” “I have no fear of wild animals because I’ve…




#124 It’s in the Contract

#124 It’s in the Contract I knew I’d hit bottom as my face scraped across the cement, and my guitar ricocheted off my back when the bouncer tossed me and it out the back door. The muscular guy wearing a black tee-shirt said, “Don’t even think about coming back.” “Damn, you’ve ruined my Gucci Shirt,”…