I wrote this story for my great grand kids and their cousin. Ages 3 to 9. I’d have made it free, but Amazon doesn’t allow that, so I charged the minimum 99 cents.
My book just dropped from # 85 to 88 on Amazon. It would be appreciated if you’d buy a copy to help make my first published novel a success. Thanks.
#65 Internal Disintegrating Words From the Id
I’m a mellow guy and get along with most everyone. Sometimes though, I come across a person who clashes with my energy field so much that being in the same room sets off sparks of animosity, hatred, violence, and vengeance.
Ms. T. is one of those. The sight of her white hair and sardonically lined face puts my emotions into an altered state. She and I belong to the same writing critique group, and she savors her opportunity to tell me how insignificant my work is compared to hers.
I watch in trepidation as she lurks in her chair, waiting to critique my work like a hawk looking for a meal. Her beady eyes set upon me as though I’ll be lunch if I utter a sound.
Her turn to critique my story comes, and she swoops in with cutting words.
“Your work is thrown together with little thought,” she says and turns my peaceful nature into a violent volcano. Inside, my collection of synapses, flesh, and bone erupts and my emotions flow like molten rock.
I fire hot language right back at this white piece of feminine saline salaciously craving to emasculate me with her list of things I wrote wrong. I’m mortified that a shrew like her can bring forth my loathing.
Her fury is awakened by mine, and her next words slash my thrown together first drafts—according to her—comparing them to her carefully thought out Greek odyssey she’s been writing for most of her life.
I’d like to be cool and intellectual and say I’m better than that, but I feel pitted like a dog, and my nature causes me to respond in kind. The replies backed up in my mouth come out laced with wicked words that flow through my lips, calculated so she’ll taste the bitter flavor of my anger.
I feel like a fool for arguing with this demon that passes for a woman. I remember what my mother always said: “If you get into an argument with an idiot, it’s soon hard to tell who the idiot is.”
I try not to argue with her, but when I don’t, I have to pay the price for holding my rage inside. It eats away inside at any pride I own when that spiteful woman spews her sardonic wisdom, saying it’s my problem and not hers. My volcano wants to explode. If I had the power of God, I’d certainly repeat his action and subdue her into a pillar of salt. Ship her off to Sodom or Gomorrah for repeating her disintegrating words in a hostile manner that calls for a reaction from my Id.
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This has been in the works since 2006. It’s full of unusual twist and turns. I believe this is one book that no one will figure out the end before the end. Jim Jackson travels to the spiritual world while frozen in a tank of nitrogen. Once revived he learns how to time travel and returns to the 1700’s to save humanity from Ezerbet’s Nemesis.
33 THOUGHTS ON READING
I will make time for reading, the way I make time for meals, or brushing my teeth.
I will make an effort to carry a book with me at all times.
I will read whatever interests me. I will read novels. I will read poems. I will read essays. I will read short stories. I will read memoirs. I will read magazines. I will read newspapers. I will read comic books. I will read self-help. I will read street signs. I will read ads. I will read instruction manuals. I will read old love letters. Etc.
I will read whatever the hell I feel like. No guilty pleasures.
I will try to clear my mind of expectations before I sit down to read. I will give each book a chance.
I will turn off my fucking phone.
I will be a good date, but I will not let an author waste my time.
I will not finish books I don’t like.
I will let boredom ring like a gigantic gong.
I will throw a book across the room.
I will read with a pencil. I will underline. I will dog ear. I will write in the margins.
I will massacre a book if I need to.
I will copy down favorite passages in my own hand, to know what writing the words feels like.
I will re-read favorite books the way I watch favorite movies and play favorite records over and over.
I will make lists of books I want to read.
I will take a deep breath and understand that it is IMPOSSIBLE to read everything.
I will toss “The Canon” out the window.
I will keep a list of books I have read. I will share this list.
When I find a book I love, I will shout about it from whatever mountaintops I have access to.
When I find an author I truly adore, an author who makes my gutstrings vibrate, I will read everything they have written. Then I will read everything that they read.
If I hate a book, I will keep my mouth shut.
I will make liberal use of the phrase, “It wasn’t for me.”
I will ask people what they are reading. I will take notes.
I will keep stacks of unread books at the ready.
The minute I finish a book, I will start a new one.
I will go to the library. I will go to the bookstore. I will get lost in the stacks.
I will read bibliographies. I will let one book lead me to another.
If I need to read for information, I will browse and skim and Google book reviews.
As often as I can, I will read out loud to someone I care about.
I will not lend out a book if I ever want to see it again. If a friend asks to borrow a beloved book, I will buy and mail them a copy.
I will not harbor the delusion that being a reader makes me a superior person.
I will not suffer under the delusion that the act of reading alone makes me a better person.
If I don’t feel like reading, I’ll go do something else. Maybe even — gasp! — watch TV.
Special thanks to Alan Jacobs, who wrote my favorite book about reading, and the other sources in my “reading” tag.
with Anu Garg
The beginning of 2015 means the starting of engines in the US presidential race. The elections will be held in late 2016, but around here we like to start early.
POTUS, the President of the United States, is a potent title. Stakes are high. If you have your eyes on the big prize, it helps to have endorsements from powerful people. And if you can manage to get the nod from the ultimate power, things should be breezy.
In the last election for the US president, no fewer than three presidential hopefuls received the backing of god. Clearly god likes to hedge his bets. Not sure why he changed his mind later on and dumped all three endorsees.
All the religious posturing by these politicians to convey their goodness should be an obvious turn off. Unfortunately, many voters want the candidates to wear their religion on their sleeves. Contrary to what they believe, religiosity doesn’t necessarily imply goodness. (See here and here.)
Religion is a personal thing. People should be free to spend as much time as they want in their places of worship or in their homes, praying to a god of their choosing. Why get government involved in the business of god (or god in the business of government)?
Why not vote for the most capable candidate irrespective of whether she bows to a particular god, or how often, or how long? Mixing religion and state is like mixing water and petrol. It spoils both. And it creates a hazard.
At one time both the religous leader and the political leader was one and the same person. In some places that’s still the norm and the results are disastrous.
Millennia of religion has left a mark on the language. I’m not religious, but I’ll read anything to track down words. This week we’ll see five people, places, and animals from the Bible that are now part of the English language.
1. A stupid person.
2. A hunter.
In the Bible, Nimrod was a hunter and Noah’s great-grandson. It’s not clear how the sense of the word transferred from a hunter to a stupid person, but the new sense was popularized in the Bugs Bunny cartoons when Bugs Bunny called rabbit-hunting Elmer Fudd as “Poor little Nimrod”. Earliest documented use for sense 1: 1933, for sense 2: 1623. Even earlier, the first recorded use in English is from 1548, in a now-obsolete sense as a tyrant.
“What kind of a nimrod makes kids the responsible party in a dim-witted ideology on poverty and neglect?”
Martin Hackworth; Ignoramus, of the Bloviating Type; Idaho State Journal (Pocatello); Feb 3, 2013.
“The big-ticket item at their giant auction was a nimrod package to go hunting.”
Dick Harmon; Hunt Nets Dough for Y; Deseret News (Salt Lake City, Utah); Jun 12, 2004.
See more usage examples of nimrod in Vocabulary.com’s dictionary.